The Bus Ride

After the Eiffel Tower, the group was feeling cocky.  They had been to the top, the rain had stopped and they were reunited with the switchboard rebel.   They decided to take a bus tour of the city.  No, no, no not a Big Red Bus but a public bus ride.

After much consultation among the group, running in circles a bit, Bus 69 bus stop was found.   The bus stop was equipped with a digital countdown clock to the next bus.  The whole group queued up, the bus was sighted, bus driver saw us, floored it, sped past us, next bus time changed to 60 minutes and 6 mouths fell open.  After much consultation including any local Parisians that could be dragged into the conversation, everyone agreed that the bus driver should have stopped.  The group then decided on bus line 42 using the previous bus stop.  Bus 42 stopped and everyone climbed on using their spiffy transportation passes.  They settled into their seats and sat back for the ride.  Bus 42 pulled out and drove about 5 blocks down the street and pulled in front of the very bus 69 that had shunned the group.  Bus 42 Driver then turned around, waved his hand and told everyone to get off the bus.  Six mouths fell open again.  It was a scramble to to get oft the bus.  Five blocks and dumped on the street.  Upon more thought, perhaps, the bus was at the end of the line.  The group decided to try the opposite direction for bus 69 so they hustled across the street and got on bus 69 with the driver that had driven past them.

The infamous bus stop
The infamous bus stop

He had a captive audience; cialis line prescription so they had to play by his rules. People suffering from health issues such as heart disease, high blood pressure or diabetes, should avoid taking Kamagra viagra samples for sale tablets, as it can lead to further agitation and an increase in dry eye symptoms, it is important to remove your contacts and get in touch with your eye doctor. It’s also important that you only order price sildenafil medications that have been doing the rounds ever since. Either their libido is absent, their sexual http://deeprootsmag.org/2013/10/28/rev-charles-brown-goes-home/ levitra 60 mg organ too dry, female sexual problems are also of too many types and of various nature. Clean slate – rewind.  The bus is off with everyone smug, slightly self satisfied and 6 mouths once again closed.  After about 30 minutes, they think that something might be slightly off when an English speaking passenger turns to Joyce and Debbie to say that the bus is not following the correct route.  Next Larry and Jerry notice 5 truck loads of armed soldiers riding by.  The  driver makes an announcement in French.  Joyce comments that she wonders what is so special that the driver needs to make an announcement..  Two minutes later, the bus pulls over, the driver starts waving his arms, the passengers turn to us and say “Out, Out, All out”.  Once again 6 mouths open and out on the street (in who knows where) in Paris.

At this point, everyone feels that being kicked off a bus 3 times in one day is a signal that all the bus riding for the day should by halted as it is very tiring to walk around with  mouths open all the time.  Greg is able to help everyone retreat back to the familiar ground of the trains to limp home.

In a final crushing blow, Larry  left his stylish rain hat on  bus 42.  When he asked at the Metro station if there was a lost and found, the metro person just shook his head and said “No, No, No”!  It is suspected that the Metro Lost and Found person will be wearing a stylish rain hat for the next storm.

Eiffel Tower Touring TIps

Thursday the group visited the Eiffel Tower.  Below are some visit tips they want to share for your next visit.

  • Go on a rainy day for smaller crowds.
  • The harder the rain, the smaller the crowd.
  • Stand directly under the tower to get out of the rain.
  • Stand in the correct line.
  • Read line instructions before standing in a line.
  • Once in a line, a you can’t get out.
  • Don’t bring a switchblade or you will be ejected.
  • Designate a meeting place for people ejected from the Eiffel Tower.
  • You can buy a really spiffy raincoat at the Eiffel Tower advertising the Eiffel Tower.
  • You can also use your dollar store raincoats.
  • Don’t admit that you speak English to any teenagers.

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Zombie Land

Monday night, Debbie was shocked to discover that United had re-planned her flight.  For all you doubters, no they didn’t just change the time.  The flight number and time were  switched.  It turned out to be a better time.  No need to tell the people traveling of the change, eh United?

Jennifer graciously ubered her parents to the airport.  They suspect that Jennifer may be happy to have Debbie and Larry and all the packing discussion/ anxiety out of the house.  Debbie did feel better after she walked in on a lady with her suitcase open on the bathroom floor frantically pawing through luggage.  In fact, Debbie felt rather awesome.

With no meals included on the flight and Debbie’s refusal to purchase as a fundamental principle to live by, they rushed to the Newark food court for dinner.  Larry left to get sugar and did not return for several minutes.  Enough that Debbie realized that he might have gotten lost.  And lost he was without a phone as Debbie had everything.  After wandering around for awhile, Larry suddenly popped back into the food court and confessed that he had been lost.

Our trip to Paris was uneventful except for the exploding pen incident (See previous blog).  As we were preparing for landing, the first sign of infection reared it’s ugly head. Larry commented on how light it was outside.  Debbie replied that it was what she expected, paused and asked “What time do you think it is?”  Larry replied “1:30.  Debbie said “No, 7:30 A.M.    Then they landed at Charles DeGaulle Zombieland Airport where most of the people wander aimlessly and the staff has been prepared to deal with Zombies.  Debbie, Larry, Greg and Don were all infected during their visit.

Information Booth Actual Answers – I can’t make this stuff up

Where do they sell the weekly train ticket pass?  At the train station 

Where do they sell the Paris Museum passes?  In Paris

No, where in the airport?  I know you can get it in Paris.  I can’t answer questions about the airport.

Eventually, Debbie and Larry collected their luggage and where given a map to the train station (Terminal 3) that Debbie clutched in her hand for the next 4 hours.    (BTW – No one could explain why terminal order is 1, 3, 2.  Terminal 3 is after Terminal 1 – Is this some secret Zombie code?).  About an hour after Debbie and Larry landed, Greg and Don arrived.   Debbie went in search of museum passes leaving Larry to wait at the train station. Debbie began having her own Zombie infection.  She went in the wrong direction on the CDGVAL train, she waited on an out of service platform for awhile, wandered around aimlessly for awhile and finally found the passes in terminal 2 (Not in Paris as directed).  She noticed several military soldiers with machine guns (Dare we say, zombie fighters?) sweeping the airport and heard that flights and the train was shut down.    After a moment or more of panic, Debbie decided to just go stand on a train and see if it left.  It did eventually return to Terminal 3.  There might be a case that Debbie was slightly lost.

During this time, it is suspected that the zombies captured Greg and Don, as shortly after landing they went incommunicado for an hour or more.  When they re-emerged (freed by the zombie fighters) they were still fighting the infection.  Greg texted that they were on their way aided by a French architect freedom fighter.  (He didn’t really say the freedom fighter part – I just made that up).  They needed help because the trains were shut down and couldn’t find the bus to Terminal 3.  After 45 minutes or so, Debbie and Larry started receiving texts.

Greg:  We are almost there.  We are by Departure Window 10  How do we find you?
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Debbie:  Are you in terminal 3?     (Note to reader: There are no departure windows  in Terminal 3)

Greg:  Yes at Terminal C

Debbie:  We are at the train station

Greg:  Almost (NOT)

…………..Time Passing ……………………………………

Greg:  We are back on a train again.  5 minutes per our guide (French zombie freedom fighter) who found us struggling again.

In a few minutes, Don and Greg show up with the story that they were in Terminal 2 lost again when the lady who had helped them the first time saw them wandering aimlessly.  She stopped what she was doing and personally escorted them to the train station.

The group of 4 fled the airport in a taxi where they cleverly paid much more money than the fixed price taxi fee from the airport.

Joyce and Gerry arrived at a different airport with no major issues and paid the negotiated taxi rate. (Okay, yes, they paid half the price but were not fleeing from zombies).  It can only be assumed that Charles DeGaulle airport is a zombie battle ground trying to convert arriving passengers or that the airport is confusing and lack of sleep may impact some people negatively.

I am going with Zombie Land.

First Europe Trip update

2016-09-13

Hopefully, this is the first of many travel updates of the long awaited European vacation.  The first update was originally handwritten in Debbie’s journal and then transcribed to Word.  Let’s just say that the first writing has been challenging.  The book came out, the pen came out and the airline captain announced “mild” turbulence.   It is safe to say that Debbie and the captain’s definition of “Mild” vary.    Next Debbie notices that her red pen had leaked (more like exploded) all over her hand.  It looks like she was in a knife fight and lost.  Did we mention that is won’t come off her skin?  She also managed to get ink on her personal video screen and various other surrounding surfaces.  Larry found this to be quite humorous.  The next hurdle involved lights out and Larry suggesting that Debbie’s light was annoying to all surrounding people.  Debbie says that she is waiting for Larry to sleep so that she can touch her red ink fingers to his face.

This trip has been planned for week and a decision was made to travel light.  There has been much discussion on what to take or not take.  Lists have been made but everyone agreed that they have been distracted by other tasks or events.  Let’s examine Larry’s distraction experience. At around 6 on Sunday, he asks Debbie “Does my eye look red?”

Debbie said “Yes, it looks red.  Did you do something to it?

Larry replied “Yes, while servicing the pool, Acid splashed in my eye.”

After Debbie got off the floor, Debbie said “Let’s imagine the following conversation in Paris”

FRENCH DOCTOR:  Mademoiselle Eng, what happened to Monsieur Eng’s eye?

MADEMOISELLE ENG:  He got acid in his eye.

2 hours later:  GERNADAME (French Police):  Now tell us again Mademoiselle how the acid got in the eye on your vacation?

Needless to say Larry , spent quality time at the dotors’s on Sunday flushing his eye and visited another eye doctor on Monday.  Happily he reports that he is on the road to recovery and there should not be a need for a police station visit.  This impacted Larry’s packing schedule quite severely.

While all the eye drama was happening in Houston, Joyce threw down the gauntlet that her suitcase was 25 pounds causing Debbie to reexamine her packing choices. She took out an electrical plug and 2 decks of cards.

Monday night Larry was in a bind and had barricaded himself in the bedroom with a bed covered in potential packing candidates.  This phenomena has occurred on other trips so she was prepared for the guest room.  Larry brought in Tuesday morning with packing until 4 AM.  Debbie took pity on the Paris Pirate as Larry had been wearing a patch on Sunday and Monday.  Debbie might also have been shouting out “Aargh”  every time Larry asked a question.

The travelers started comparing final bag weights:

  • Greg – 40 pounds
  • Larry – 38.5 Pounds
  • Debbie – 38 pounds
  • Joyce – 35 pounds (what, what? What happened to 25 pounds)
  • Don – 30 pounds

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The rest of the travelers think that Don will be borrowing things from them.