Author: admin-eng

When I was in Junior High, I participated in track. I didn’t really like track but my Dad told me that I shouldn’t just do the sports that I was good at and for some unknown reason the coach had me run hurdles. It gave me a new perspective about blithely throwing out the term “a few hurdles to overcome. It used to scare the heck out of me that I was going to trip over the hurdle and fall flat on my face in the gravel or better yet become entangled in the hurdle and roll down the track with the hurdle (this before breakaway). When I went to high school, I did not volunteer that I has ever seen a hurdle before.

Well, this last month has seemed like a series of hurdles to get to the trip. First, Debbie had dreams of chocolate croissants and Italian food only to have her dreams dashed with dental surgery and a soft diet. She kept saying but shouldn’t we do this after our trip?

No, no it will be fine…blah, blah, blah..next thing Debbie knows she is eating soup and will be reporting on soups on the trip.

Larry’s hurdle was house related and involved multiple part failures. He is on first name basis with the people at the UPS store.

Lastly, Debbie and Larry waited to run the dishwasher. Debbie firmly believes in scrubbing or prewashing all dishes. Larry has been working with Debbie to let it go. Every night, Debbie would ask “Can we run the dishwasher tonight?”

And Larry would say “Let’s wait one more night”.

Well, last night the dishwasher was full and it was the last night. It was go time. But alas the dishwasher would not start. So Debbie and Larry spent an hour washing dishes old school. Last hurdle done with maybe a skinned knee.

It is time for another trip. No, not just the National Parks this time but Switzerland and Northern Italy. Bring on the hurdles.

In the spirit of Les Cheap girls (filles pas chères for those schooled in French), a free coffee tour was planned. The four charged (get it? in a charger) their way to Greenwell Coffee Farms in Kona.

The Hard Hitting Reporter went with them to the tour.

HHR: Could someone in the group tell our readers about the tour?

Debbie: Well, you are a hard hitting reporter. You could tell them if you hadn’t skipped the tour and sat on the patio drinking free coffee.

HHR: Debbie, we don’t really need your input since you don’t drink coffee.

Larry: The tour told us that Kona coffee is coffee grown in a particular geographic area.

Debbie: Yes and then people asked the guide over and over what was Kona coffee trying to trick him. What if you add coffee and it is not grown in that geographic area? What if it rains more in one place than the other? What if they harvest at different times? Blah blah blah.. It is the same answer people.

HHR: Debbie you seem a bit hostile about this tour.

Jerry: Well, it was about to pour down rain on the tour and you were sitting on the patio. People did ask a lot of questions.

HHR: How is the taste determined?

Larry: Well, it depends on the soil, weather, harvest.

Debbie: Again, people asked the question over and over. I heard one lady ask her spouse if he was bored. His response was that it was okay but so many questions.

Joyce: The tour was an hour long but was only supposed to be 30 minutes. Did you know that coffee was discovered in Ethiopia by goats eating coffee beans and acting peppy?

Jerry: They also grow peppercorns for some reason to help the coffee. We saw them covered with fertilizer on the ground.

Debbie: Yes, and some tour members ate the peppercorns off the ground sort of like the goats ate the coffee. I think that might be airplane barkers.

HHR: That’s plenty of information from you Debbie

Debbie: It was a good La Cheap Girl tour.

Larry: I just want to say that my coffee is better. and I don’t pay $60.00 a pound

Debbie had carefully reminded Joyce when they were arriving. Joyce said that they would not have any problem finding them because she had rented a red charger. Debbie read the text and shouted “Muscle Car”. Larry heard the news and shouted “Muscle Car!” They had visions of throwing the doors open and leaping out at the ready. Debbie thought this might negate the purple shoes.

Debbie and Larry arrived in Kona and it was dark, pitch dark. Too dark to see colors. Once Debbie and Larry figured out that they were standing in the taxi lane and that was why people were driving by yelling at them things went better.

They spotted the muscle car which looked quite impressive. However there was a policeman standing by Joyce’s window. He looked like the Rock’s little brother who we will call Chip. (Get it a chip off the Rock). Chip, smiled at Joyce and said two things. One, you are in a handicap zone and two how familiar are you with how a charger works? Chip went on to explain that the back lights weren’t turned on and reached in to adjust them. Chip wished us a pleasant trip and sent us on our paranoid way as we do not believe that the front and back light can be turned on separately. This means that the group constantly check their lights before driving anywhere.

There also seem to be lots of chargers in Hawaii. The group has since decided that only people over 60 are given muscle cars especially red ones. They also don’t actually leap out of the car – it’s more like the dryer door flings open and dumps the towels on the floor.

The hard-hitting reporter is traveling with the group to keep you updated on the latest Hawaiian travel. HHR begins her reporting with an interview about their flights to Hawaii.

HHR: Debbie, those are quite the shoes you have on. I didn’t know that purple could be that bright. You seem to be the only one in the airport with purple shoes on.

Debbie: I didn’t think your wheelhouse is fashion. Only true fashionistas know about purple shoes. Do you have questions about the trip?

HHR: Larry, can you tell us about the first leg of your trip to San Francisco?

Larry: Well, Debbie and I sat across the aisle from each other. The flight attendant offered us pretzels or cookies. I took the pretzels, and then Debbie gave me a granola bar.

Debbie: Let me interrupt right here and say that Larry said that he could eat any granola bar. So I just gave him one that I didn’t think I would like. I was quite surprised when Larry was mouthing “Rancid” at me and pointing to the bar.

Larry : Turned out the granola bar was rancid. I had to spit it out.

HHR: That’s shocking! Did you think Debbie was trying to poison you?

Debbie Wait a minute. When I saw Larry was having trouble with the granola bar, I gave him a third of my special sweet and salty, dark chocolate and almond granola bar. It was really hard for me to give up that third because I was really hungry.

HHR: Larry, what happen when you got to San Francisco?

Larry: Well, Debbie immediately raced off the plan and got herself a special deli sandwich called “The Nob Hill”. I went to Burger King.

Debbie Hold on, I offered you 2/3 (the lady couldn’t cut straight) of my sandwich. Then you just didn’t come back and I thought well maybe I should make it half-and-half so I ate part of it and then it just all disappeared. I mean Larry got a whole Whopper.

HHR: What happened on the next flight to Kona?

Larry: I’ll tell you – Debbie got upgraded to first class.

HHR: Larry, did you get upgraded?

Debbie: Hey – I did get Larry a row by yourself and close to the front.

Larry: Yes, but the man in front of me couldn’t hear very well and shouted all his conversations.

Debbie: I kept waving to you until the man in front of you started waving back to me.

HHR: Debbie, Tell us about your food on the trip.

Debbie: Well, I had warm nuts, a drink, thai chicken and then a warm chocolate chip cookie. It was so hard trying to sleep with all the food service.

Larry: I had a pretzel.

HHR: Well, Debbie sounds like you had a delightful time. Larry, I am so sorry.

Debbie: I got him to Hawaii, didn’t I? Why don’t you talk to Joyce and Jerry about their trip?

HHR: Jerry, Joyce – tell us about your trip.

Joyce: Well, we did have an incident. We were in a 3 seat row with a Irish guy named Ian by the window. In the row in front of Ian sat Uri.

Jerry: During the flight, Uri reached back and touched Ian’s knee. Ian went berserk and started cursing. This set off Uri who began to curse in Polish.

Joyce: The flight attendant was called. The attendant told Uri to calm down and was told to stop touching people.

Jerry: Then Uri started barking and howling like a dog. The flight attendant had to ask Uri not to bark.

HHR: It sounds like an intriguing trip.

Joyce: We think the flight attendant might be considering a new line of work.

Recently, Debbie determined the importance of feet. Wrong shoes can make your life difficult. She now submits to pedicures. Her feet are often featured in photographs. Wrong shoes can make your life difficult. Debbie wants to have happy feet.

In theory, there are shoes that that make one’s back more comfortable, and Debbie wanted that so she went on a shoe quest. The first pair was purchased and soon arrived. The pair had white rubber one inch wide surrounding the shoe. On that white rubber in large capital letters was the word “ORTHOPEDIC”. Debbie was a walking billboard from 30 feet away. Debbie decided that as much as she wanted her feet to be happy that this could not happen and returned the shoes.

The next pair in the quest were made by Kuru. The company is a bit more sedate with the advertising but they do send an email every day asking Debbie if she needs another pair of Kuru shoes. Debbie now has a brilliant purple pair of shoes which are visible 30 feet away. However Debbie has decided to stick with her Merrell shoes but use the Kuru shoes in the house. They are a bit loud .

Debbie is taking her Merrell shoes to Hawaii. She will be sedate yet with happy feet.

Unfortunately, when Debbie was on the way to the airport she looked down to find the purple shoes were on her feet. She almost screamed out loud how did this happen?

Debbie sat in the airport wearing a five-year-old girl’s dream outfit of a pink shirt with purple shoes. It’s going to be a long flight.

Arlington Cemetery

Debbie was recently in Washington DC for the induction of her brother into the “in memory” Vietnam Memorial honor roll.

My good friend, Laurette, came with me for moral support and we had time for sightseeing.  Together, we figured out how to ride the Metro and even purchased a multi-day pass. (This required quite a bit of consultation, but we were successful.)  We almost got on the wrong train a couple of times and once Debbie did jump on a train that was leaving without verifying where the train was going. It turns out it was the correct train which made Debbie says she knew all along. (We are somewhat doubtful of Debbie‘s truthfulness in her navigational skills ).

One of the places that they went was Arlington cemetery. It was an amazing place. Debbie also discovered some things she didn’t know. So be prepared for a lot of history here.

Historical Note: So just bear with the history lesson.  George Washington was Martha Washington’s 2^nd husband.  When her first husband died, Martha became the wealthiest widow in Virginia.  George ended up with two stepchildren from the marriage. One of which was John Parke Custis.  The step son had a son, George Washington Parke Custis (called Wash) who was raised by George Washington.   (We are getting there).  Wash built Arlington house and had a daughter named Mary Anna Randolph Custis who inherited all of Wash’s land.

Mary Anna married (Here is comes) Robert E. Lee.  She spent most of her time at Arlington House as she did not like the Army life.  When Robert E. Lee resigned his commission and became the Virginia commander, he told his wife that she needed to flee from Arlington House.  (We don’t think that she was very excited by this and that he probably didn’t discuss it with her. We would have been mad.).

The Union troops seized Arlington.  We spent a long time talking to one of the volunteers.  The volunteer told us that General Meigs had gone to West Point with Robert E. Lee and been to dinner at Arlington House.  Two of Meigs’ sons had been killed in the war.  Meigs wanted to punish Lee and did not ever want Lee to return to Arlington House so he buried Union officers around the house next to the garden so that Lee would see the tombstones.  Lee never returned to Arlington and his wife did once but did not go in the house. Eventually the Lee family sued the government and the courts awarded the family money for the land.

We never realized that Arlington was tied to George Washington or Robert E. Lee.  In case you were worried, we were able to successfully navigate from Arlington to the 911 monument at the Pentagon and then back to the hotel. Later that day we couldn’t navigate on foot but managed to return back to the hotel.

Here’s another fun fact. Amazon’s second headquarters is going to be located in Crystal City so lots of construction. We also found that you could get National Park passport stamps at Arlington House. Debbie also continued her hot dogs around the world quest from the food trucks in D.C.

Today was whale watching day. The group managed to be first in line for the boat. Joyce managed to secure the front of the boat. During the trip, a lady, (we’ll call Ramona) did move up to the front. The group had difficulty taking a picture without Ramona in their pictures.

Debbie was surprised to learn that whale watching had a dress code and she was under dressed. Debbie noted that one of the passengers that we shall call Ashley wore glitter makeup and false eyelashes. Ashley also wore flashy white pants. Debbie wore black pants, sunscreen and a hat. Unfortunately, they did not get a picture of Ashley.

This was the best whale watching that Debbie and Larry had been on. On other trips, they saw nothing but a whale tale or two. The group saw several whales causing Debbie to take many pictures mainly of ocean water. They did see a breach and managed to secure a picture through charm.

Debbie is going shopping for some glitter makeup for the next whale watching trip.

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Our photographer, Larry, has captured an exciting nature moment. Debbie has explained her interpretation of what happened. But first a few definitions (Yes, we weren’t going to do that but changed our mind)

A gobbler or tom turkey is a mature male bird. There will be shifts in physical appearance and behavior as they get older, but a gobbler is essentially a gobbler on its 2 year birthday. Males fight for dominance and to be have female admirers. Debbie finds them to be somewhat annoying as they always strut and show their feathers when she appears until she tells them to cut it out.

A jake is an immature male bird. How old is a jake turkey? Generally, people define a jake turkey as a one-year-old bird. They can also sometimes be confused with hens in the field.

Jakes, as they mature, try to become the leader of females by fighting or pecking (thus the term pecking order).

As the group was returning for the day, they rolled up on three turkeys. Debbie thinks two tom (jakes) want to be and a Tom fighting. At first they thought the turkeys necks were stuck together and then realized what was happening. Debbie yelled at them and got out of the car until the others pointed out how this might not be prudent so she jumped back in the car.

In our trips thus far Joyce has tried to get out of the car for a bear and Larry was out when an elk bugled so in comparison the turkey jump looks good. Jerry pointed out that no animal has made him try to jump out of a car. However Debbie does remember Jerry, Joyce and Larry hiding behind a tree from a moose while Debbie was left to fend for herself. Just saying….Nature can make you lose common sense for a moment.

There is short video at the end. We are striving to be able to load the complete story!

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The group took a coffee tour on the Kona side where Joyce found a cat. They also ran around looking for fruit.  They can’t explain it other than they felt fruit should be growing on the green side of the mountain.  They found one grapefruit on a tree. The cat would not accompany us on the tour. Debbie stayed true to Parker.

 They went to the place of refugee. It is kind of like playing chase with dire circumstances. If you made it to the place of refugee, you were forgiven. If not punishment could be severe. Women were not supposed to eat many of the foods such as fish, pineapple and other fruits. The punishment was death in many cases.

Larry also found some ducks and chickens along with goats during their travels.

The group went on a timeshare tour reestablishing that Debbie should be a member of the Cheap Girls.  The best part was the box lunches.

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The group began with a visit to Pu’ukohola Helau National Historic site. Debbie busily read signs and listened to the National Park blog . Debbie is pretty sure that she would flunk Hawaiian 7th grade state history as she can’t possibly spell the names and loses focus after the 4th letter. Debbie does feel confident that she would make a higher grade than the other 3 who were whale watching. She knows that King Kamehameha was not always nice to his party guests.

After standing in the hot sun for awhile, the group decided it was snack time. They drove to Hamakua Macadamia factory. As they drove up the drive, a whisper swept through the building. “She’s back..She’s here again”. The employees met Debbie at the door with news of SIX new flavors. No free samples but Debbie bought two of the new types with a promise to return. The employees were ecstatic that she had returned. Vanilla birthday cake macadamia nuts for everyone.

On the way back, the car made an unplanned stop at a Malasada food truck. They clearly did not know what they wanted to order. Malasadas are Portuguese doughnuts without a hole. They can be filled with a custard flavored filling since no hole. Debbie knows this because she turned hers upside down an dumped most of the filling out. There may have been some inappropriate words involved and flinging of custard with people jumping out of cars. Debbie will be happy to eat another but not with filling.

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