The Return of the Hat

After the victorious Notre Dame climb, the group traveled to the Pompidou area for lunch.  It is a nice neighborhood and a prime place for people watching.  It also has plenty of shops to visit.  Greg, Larry, and Don disappeared for a long time into a shop.  When they reappeared, the hat had made a triumphant return in triplicate.  Le Hat Boys were born.  It was explained that the hats were the perfect head covering for potential rain days and that they thought it made them look quite debonair.   (On a side note, Jerry was not too upset about the lack of a hat – remember he has a $1.00 store raincoat).
Next stop was lunch.  Jerry decided to take the steak tartar plunge (maybe he was more upset about the hat than everyone thought).   Joyce continued with her duck tour across Paris.  The restaurant was very busy and service was someone sporadic (This is being really, really nice).  The sequence of events were as follows:

  • Soup was served to Joyce and Larry
  • Greg and Don served lunch
  • Joyce and Jerry served lunch
  • Greg and Don finished lunch
  • (Notice anyone missing here?)
  • Larry volunteered to cancel his and Debbie’s meal because he could get by on  soup
  • Debbie gives Larry the stink-eye
  • Larry decided not to cancel order (Plus the whole French/English explanation would be difficult)
  • Jerry finished lunch
  • Joyce asked where Debbie and Larry’s lunch might be
  • Waiter picked up Larry’s soup dish and turned in order
  • Jerry finished lunch
  • Joyce took time eating
  • Waiter avoided table
  • Waiter brought Debbie and Larry’s lunch
  • Waiter said that their order took awhile
  • Debbie gobbled down her lunch
  • Everyone finished lunch

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After the long, long lunch, the group strolled to the Pompidou Center, a modern area museum among other things.  (Retail Value: 8 Euro).  It had some interesting areas. The nearby Stravinsky Fountain  features sixteen whimsical moving and water-spraying sculptures  which represent themes and works by composer Igor Stravinsky. The Place in front of the museum is noted for the presence of street performers.  (Artistic review – Modern art is not for everyone).

The group split into two different groups.  (Debbie suspects because she was advocating for another church visit.)  Jerry, Joyce, Larry and Debbie stopped at Eglise-St-Eustache.  History Moment: The present building was built between 1532 and 1632.  St Eustache’s is considered a masterpiece of late Gothic architecture. The church’s reputation was strong enough to be chosen as the location for a young Louis XIV to receive communion. Mozart also chose the sanctuary as the location for his mother’s funeral.  While visiting the church, a baptism was in progress with beautiful singing.

On the final day of the museum pass, the total value used was 125.50 Euro.  Total savings: 51.50 Euro.

Tower of Notre Dame

Les Cheap Girls discovered that the museum pass included access to the North Tower of Notre Dame.  (8.5 Euro).  This entitled the ticket owner to hike up 400 steps to the top of Notre Dame.  They were thrilled as they had already walked up 284 steps to the top of the Arc.  An additional 116 steps is nothing.  (Turns out that they were wrong).

The day dawned bright and Debbie interviewed potential participants for her blog.  She was disappointed with some of their responses and had to edit heavily.  Please see the edited interviews below:

Debbie:  Larry, Jerry and Greg are you going to climb the Tower today?

Jerry, Larry and Greg:  There is no way that I am doing that many stairs.  You people are crazy.   No, we just don’t feel that we would be successful.  I think it is wonderful if anyone can climb 400 steps.  Those people are awesome.

Debbie:  Tell me Joyce and Don how do you feel?  Are you nervous?

Joyce:  I am a little nervous but think I can do it.

Don:  I can’t decide whether to go up 2 steps at a time or run up the stairs.

Debbie:  What will you guys be doing while the others climb the Tower?

Greg:  Drinking Coffee

Larry:  Sitting down and drinking coffee

Jerry:  Staying with them, sitting down and drinking coffee

Larry, Greg, Jerry:  We will be ready with refreshments for the climbers and a camera to record this momentous event.  We only wish that we were up to the climb.
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Debbie:  Any last comments?

Joyce:  Team Luxembourg rising from the ashes.

Debbie:  Go Team Luxembourg!

Don:  I love being on Team Luxembourg.  I am sorry that I ever considered quitting.

The Les Cheap Girls hustled everyone out the door to stand in line.  Only 20 people are let in every 10 minutes so that climbers are staggered.  Did you know that there is such a thing as “Skip the Line” tours?  Les Cheap Girls refused this idea as an insult to their cheapness.  Regardless, Team Luxembourg was ecstatic to be in position 18, 19 and 20.  (Maybe not Don but Joyce and Debbie immediately snapped to the concept of no one behind them for 10 minutes).  So they took pictures, stopped when they got tired and so what if they lost sight of the others?

Eventually, they arrived at the viewing platform.  It was single file, one way around the platform.  This made for some interesting dances as people tried to pass.  (Okay, Joyce and Debbie might have been going the wrong way part of the time).  It had great views and allowed you to get up close with gargoyles.

The three followed a tour group into the bell tower.   The group stood under the bells.  The security guard sat in what looked like a sound proof plexi-glass cage.  Don posed Joyce and Debbie under the bells for pictures.  This made Debbie a little nervous as it was time for the bells to ring and she was not in a plexi-glass cube.  (She can be a little skittish after the alarm incident).  The bells did ring but in another part of the church.

Team Luxembourg was feeling quite cocky about their success until the guard told them to line up to go to the roof.  (They thought they were at the top).  Guess who was in position 1, 2, and 3.  No playing around this time with the line behind them.  It was more than 100 circular steps.  Joyce said that she was at the point of telling people just to step over her as she lay on the steps.  Luckily, she saw the light at the top and powered through.  Happily, they reached the summit.

The way down to their admiring supporters was a breeze.  (There were no refreshments).

New YTD Retail value: 117.50 Euro

Security in Paris

It would be remiss if the group did not mention security in Paris.  There is definitely increased security with police and the military roaming with automatic weapons that guard monuments and streets.  As you go into a monument or museum, there is security, wanding and sometimes x-rays.  All purses are searched although not  thoroughly.  One portion of the purse is unzipped so that security can look inside.  Large department stores also wand and search purses.

The group saw more police action in the last 2 weeks than the last year at home.  We saw streets blocked, van loads of military personnel, and lots of patrols.  Although there is a big police / military presence, we never felt in danger.  There were definitely fewer tourists and shorter lines.  We still recommend that people visit.

As far as tourist safety/crime, the group did experience a couple of attempts. There are certain Metro stops where warning messages about pickpockets are made in multiple languages.  Both, Larry and Greg, had their back pockets patted down (not by security but friendly pick pockets).  One at the Eiffel Tower and the other on the crowded Metro.  Jerry, Joyce and Debbie maintained that it is because they look like “Easy pickings”.  Larry and Greg insist that it is because they are the most security conscience.  (You know they both have pocket knives.)

Don’s incident fell into his own category.  He had the most harrowing experience of the group.  Don and Greg had been to the Eiffel Tower at night (No doubt they were jealous of the stunning pictures that the others had taken.)  They were returning via the Metro stop, Bir-Hakeim.  This is a poorly lit stop with construction in the surrounding area.  To enter at station, one scans a Metro badge, walks through a chute and the gate opens if a successful scan.  People queue up behind each other in the chute.  Greg went through the gate (remember he normally leads).  Don followed but the scan was unsuccessful.  He was mobbed by teenage boys trying to grab his shoulder bag.  Luckily, Don was able to hold them off while Greg got the gate open.  As the boys left, they threw another man’s wallet through the gate.  The man didn’t even know that he had lost the wallet until it flew over the gate.  (Hooray for Don!).

In summary, did we feel safe?  Yes.

Our advice to you:

  • Be aware of your surroundings
  • Don’t carry all your valuables with you especially in high traffic areas.
  • Don’t use Bir-Hakeim as an entrance or exit at night

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Would we go to Paris again?  Absolutely

 

 

 

 

 

 

Les Cheap Girls Stumble

The Les Cheap Girls liked Fountainbleau so much that they decided to go to Versailles again.  They decided that they could brave the lines.  (It was on the museum pass after all) .

Don and Greg decided to visit Giverny.  History Moment:  It’s known as the place where painter Claude Monet lived and worked from 1883 until his death in 1926. The artist’s former home and elaborate gardens, where he produced his famed water lily series..  (Not on the pass –  shocking disregard for the pass value).  Did you know that the train is cheaper the earlier you go?  This little know fact inspired Don and Greg to begrudgingly catch the early  train.  There was much coffee drinking and mumbling as they left.

The trip to Versailles was uneventful.  Debbie believes because people had time to prepare.  (Just saying). Shockingly, there were no lines at Versailles even the toilets.  Retail Cost:  18 Euro  History Moment:  A royal château in Versailles.  Here is Debbie’s version.  Louie XVI and Marie Antoinette spent too much money, people got mad and overthrew the king.  Also World War I Treaty of Versailles was signed where?  You guessed it Versailles.

After the chateau tour, the cheap girls actually sprang for the fee for the garden entrance.  (What is happening?)    During the tour of the chateau and garden, other people began to annoy Debbie.  She felt that there was a general disrespect for history with all the ridiculous poses, selfies and selfie sticks that the tourists were using and the complete unawareness of anyone else around them.  Debbie made it her mission to photo bomb as many shots as possible that day.  (Bet you didn’t think they knew what photo bombing was did you?)   She also enlisted Larry who helped unknowingly but willing. Debbie and Larry’s smiling faces now reside in many photographs.  Some of the tourists were challenged in other ways.  One foreign tourist had the villa’s audio guide  around her neck (Let’s call her Betty).  As Betty exited the chateau, the video guide alarm similar to an ambulance siren went off and kept going off as Betty walked and boarded the bus.  The alarm finally died as Betty entered the bus.

It was a lovely day as they walked through the garden to the Grand Trianon and Petit Traianon.  They enjoyed the fountains, canals, and photo bombing.  Debbie also caught Joyce walking on the grass (there were pictures of feet with a circle through ignored by Joyce.  (Debbie was most distressed).  Once again, the group walked the longest possible route to get to where they were going with Debbie gathering chestnuts to throw at other participants to speed them up.  At the beginning of the return, Debbie was ready to trot back up to the garden/chateau.   Joyce not so much.  Joyce  wanted to pay to take a train back.  Debbie was shocked.  She thought that the ghost of Maria Antoinette had somehow possessed Joyce causing extravagant spending.   In the face of ghost royalty and peer pressure, Debbie broke down and spent the 4 euro. She was actually quite happy when the train went all the way to the chateau and thought Joyce’s idea was well founded.  Maybe Joyce Antoinette knew what she was talking about.

 The group exited into the city of Versailles and looked for a low price restaurant to try to recover some of the train costs.  They ate at Restaurant le Jasmin de Tunis.  After lunch, they visited another church, Cathedrale Saint Louis, in Versailles.  It is a beautiful church and highly recommend a visit if you go to Versailles.    Total miles walked 9.50 (Good thing they took the petit train).

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Total YTD Retail Price:  109 Euro –   Les Cheap Girls Rock even if the sun did see their wallets today.

 

Art Day

This was Art Day for the group.  The six started out together at the Musee De L’Orangerie. (Retail Value:  7.50 Euro)  History Moment:  In the 1920s, France arranged for two oval-shaped rooms to be built at the Musee de l’Orangerie to house eight big murals of Monet’s “Water Lilies” series which Monet had said he would donate to the French state. Monet provided the specifications for the rooms that should hold the paintings, and opened in 1927. Thus began the Musee de l’Orangerie.  An interesting side-note, the Musee de l’Orangerie was originally what was known as an “orangery”.  An “orangery” was somewhat like a greenhouse and many wealthy families had them near their palaces; the name stems from the time when citrus trees would be kept under cover during the winter in order to protect the delicate plants.  The museum contains works by Renoir, Cézanne, Gauguin, Monet, Sisley, Picasso, and Matisse.  (Retail value: 7.50 Euro).  After the touring the museum, the group split with Don and Greg headed to the Museum Orsay.

The other four headed to the Louvre. (Retail Value:  15 Euro)  History Moment:  The Louvre is the world’s largest museum and a historic monument in Paris, France.  The foursome took their time wandering through the Tuileries Garden to the back entrance of the Louvre.  They were able to walk right in with no lines.  They picked up their English language maps and stood in the middle of the flow of people (similar to standing in the middle of a river) to get their bearings.  They decided to head for the Mona Lisa.  Joyce turned to Debbie and said “You can lead us.”  Debbie wants to point out that this was really a bad choice on Joyce’s part.  Debbie likes to study the maps intently and look things up on the internet.  Debbie was unprepared. (Did you know there is an interactive map of the Louvre if you are prepared)  There are three wings in the Louvre.  The wings are Sully, Richelieu and Denon.  Debbie believes the maps are flawed.  Who puts the same wing on the same page?   Greg had already been and said that their were signs everywhere pointing to the Mona Lisa, etc.  Well, there are not if you are in the wrong wing.  Just saying.  Debbie mistakenly believed that the Mona Lisa was in the Richelieu wing.  So, she led them around for an hour in the wrong wing. (If you are looking for a wing without a lot of people try Richelieu).  About half way through, Debbie realized that she had a walk through podcast of the Louvre.  (Doesn’t include Richelieu).  With Joyce and a museum guards help, the group eventually found the Mona Lisa and saw some other great art along the way.

By now, it was well past lunch time and the group was looking for lunch.  As they searched for a restaurant, Joyce and Larry suddenly perked up.  They had spotted  Higuma Restaurant.  Jerry and Debbie knew the choice was made.  They had held out a whole week without going to an Asian restaurant.  It was an opportunity for Debbie to win the “Adventure Award” but she did not.

After lunch, Joyce felt so good that she suggested that we walk home.  Debbie and Larry always ready for more steps agreed.  In hindsight, this might have been a mistake.  Walking home involved a prolonged rest at the park and a total walked of over 7 miles.

Total value YTD Museum Pass:  94 Euro – Les Cheap Girls are happy!
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Chateau de Fontainebleau

The group decided to visit one of the chateaus on the museum pass  The Chateau de Fontainebleau is one of the sites listed on the museum and had good reviews.  Retail cost:  11 Euro  History Moment:  Fontainebleau is a town southeast of Paris, known for the opulent Fontainebleau Palace. Built by French royalty, with parts dating back to the 1100s, the palace houses Marie Antoinette’s Turkish boudoir, the Napoleon Museum and a lavish theater. Its formal gardens feature ornamental lakes and sculptures. Surrounding the town and chateau is Fontainebleau forest.

Greg had been acting as the navigation officer (He was the first to bite the data roaming bullet).   In this role, Greg was sometimes subjected to intense questioning by other members of the group and he was not sure how he felt about leading them like a Mother Duck with ducklings straggling  behind.  (Quacking – Where are we going?  What is the stop?  Where is (Insert name?)).    Joyce and Debbie took pity on Greg and researched the route to Fontainebleau.  It required a bus ride, Metro Ride, and a TRAIN RIDE.  They researched and planned that sucker like it was a military campaign.  They knew what train to take, how to read the signs, how to find platform A or B,  yellow or blue gates and how to find the gate number of letter.

The group marched through the train station like a well executed machine.  They were so early that Don and Greg went for a snack while everyone else went in search of toilets.  The toilet search involved a long walk to another platform and .80 cent payment per person.  (Debbie had to fund Larry.  He has since been issued his own change.)  There was also an incident where Debbie ended up flashing the train station because the lock did not work.  Debbie personally felt that she should have been given a refund but felt that arguing this point in a foreign language would not bode well plus would mess up the well oiled machine.  Everyone made it back to the rendezvous point to board on time.

Some of the more interesting highlights of the Chateau were:

  • The Pope’s Apartment – It sounds nice and friendly but actually the Pope was held prisoner
  • Napoleon I Museum –  They have the Napoleon coat and 3 cornered hat
  • The Great Apartments – Napoleon and his wife’s apartment including the room where he abdicated.  (This is also where Debbie started figuring out that Josephine got dumped because his wife’s name was Archduchess Marie Louise of Austria not Josephine).  Some rooms designed by Maria Antoinette (never got to use them as she went to La Conciergerie)
  • The Gardens – Lots of room to walk

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The group went to Montebello’s Steak House for lunch just outside the chateau.  During this trip, Debbie decided to award the Adventure Award. This is the award for going outside one’s comfort zone and be adventurous.   Our first award goes to Joyce for ordering steak tartar with a raw egg on top.  The waitress asked two times if we knew what it was and if Joyce was sure.  Congratulations to our winner.  (Note: Joyce said that she will not order again.  2nd Note:  Debbie will never win this award for steak tartar).

The Chateau was given a high rating with small crowds.  Well worth the trip.

Total YTD Museum Pass value:  71.5 Euro

 

A Photographer’s Nightmare

A lot of research has been done for this trip.  Everything that was read suggested that Sainte-Chapelle was crowded with long lines.  The best approach was to arrive early and be there at opening at 9:30.  As the group rounded the corner at 9:00, they saw a long line 6 to 10 people across snaking down half a block.   It appeared that the research was correct and it would be a long morning.  They even had guards with guns holding the lines back and sometimes lawyer looking people came out and dragged someone out of line into the building.  (Seems a bit extreme).  Greg, our interpreter extraordinaire , explained that we were in the Department of Justice line for court and not Sainte-Chapelle. The church is surrounded by government buildings that use the same entry for tourist and people called to court. Once in the correct line, Joyce was ecstatic that the group was number one in line.  (There was a woman that tried to sneak up to first position but through stink eyes and proper body blocking the threat was averted.  The group also believes that the man who sets up the ropes for the lines does not enjoy his job and should consider seeking employment elsewhere). Retail Price:  10 Euro  History Moment:  Built in seven years, an impressive feat, the Sainte Chapelle was intended to house precious Christian relics, including Christ’s crown of thorns, acquired by Saint Louis.

Crypte Archeologique was next on the list.  Retail Cost:  5 Euros History Moment:  A display of ancient, Medieval & more recent remains found under Notre Dame during renovations.

The Conciergerie is a few minutes walk from Sainte-Chapelle and Notre Dame.  Now here is where Debbie got confused.  A definition of a concierge is a person who is employed to someone who is employed  to help guests arrange things.    Retail Price 8.50 Euro.  History Moment:  (Are you skipping these?  Debbie may ask you about them – Don’t cheat).  A medieval royal palace that became a revolutionary tribunal and Marie-Antoinette’s prison until she was executed.  Debbie will never think of a concierge in the same way again.  What exactly did they arrange for these prisoners?  A trip to the guillotine?

At this point, Don and Greg, left the group as they did not want to proceed to the Pantheon.  The other’s made a quick stop at the Creperie Genia.  At least, as quick as you can be in Paris.

History Moment:  In 1744, Louis XV recovered from a serious illness from which he said he was cured by invoking Saint Genevieve.  Louis XV built a monument dedicated a to Genevieve.  In 1791, the monument was transformed into the National Pantheon.  Famous French citizens are buried in the Pantheon. It is a spacious building with plenty of seats to rest tired feet.  Some of the famous citizens buried are Victor Hugo, Pierre and Madame Curie.  Retail Cost: 7 Euro

The next stop was the Musee de l’Armee (Retail value 11 Euro) – History Moment:  This is the Museum of French Military History and the Tomb of Napoleon.  The military history is interesting and goes through World War II.  The group walked around for awhile and were ready to visit Napoleon’s Tomb. At this point, the nightmare occurred.  Debbie dropped her camera on the cement floor.  Yes, you read it correctly.  She dropped her camera and she did this in front of everyone.  No need for a stage – just drop the camera.  After the shock wore off, Debbie picked it up and turned it on.   She is sorry to report that the camera no longer focuses and is out of service.   Debbie went into deep mourning and depression.  The group continued on to Napoleon’s tomb.  At the tomb, Debbie starts to understand that her whole concept of Napoleon and Josephine was all wrong.  She thought Josephine was buried in the tomb.  It was really his brother, Joseph.  Here is a little test of your knowledge.

  • Was either married before they met? Yes, Josephine was and she was separated from her husband then he died.
  • Did Napoleon and Josephine get divorced?  Yes, they did.  (What?  I thought they were the big love story!  This explain why it was Joseph buried in the tomb not Josephine)
  • Why did he divorce her?  Because she could not produce an heir and Napoleon had a child with his mistress so felt it was Josephine’s fault. (Again, what???)
  • Did she have any children?  Yes, two with her former husband
  • Did one or more have affairs while married?  Yes, they both did.  (What? What?   Again what happened to the love affair?)
  • Napoleon was Catholic.  How did he get a divorce?  The official who conducted the marriage it was not entitled to do so, the officer who witnessed Napoleon’s signature was too young, the bride reduced her age by four years to 29 and the groom gave a false address and date of birth.  (How many times, can Debbie say what?)

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Total Pass saving year to date: 60.5 Euro.  The La Cheap Girls are feeling good!

Museum Ready, Set, Go

Monday was the day that everyone started the all important Paris Museum Pass. The pass gives a holder 6 consecutive days to visit any or all of the sights on the pass.  The challenge is to visit as many sites as possible to see if one can get more value than the retail cost for the pass.  Understand the challenge, now? (Yes, yes, it is supposed to be a better deal but can you optimize that deal?  74 Euro is the cost to beat)   The Cheap Girls feel up to the challenge.

After the previous days 11 mile walk, Greg and Don have dumped the others for a more relaxing day.  They left talking about walking less than 10 miles and drinking while they did it.

The others began their museum tour with a visit to the Chateau de Vincennes. The group (Debbie) was a little concerned because the pass holder just wrote the date on the ticket in ink.  It seemed like this could open up the pass to cheating.  Joyce seemed rather excited by this prospect.   History Moment:  The Château de Vincennes is a massive 14th and 17th century French royal fortress in the town of Vincennes, to the east of Paris, now a suburb of the metropolis.  (Retail cost:  8.50 Euro).  An interesting fact – on the first visit of the four to Paris in 2003; they stayed close to the Chateau and walked past it everyday at least twice.  (Note to their children – oops. )  It was interesting but not fully furnished or rebuilt.  An art exhibit was held in some of the areas that lacked restoration in order to promote more traffic.  (Maybe they should consider using the cemetery’s marketing firm).  The exhibit was confusing to ours visitors  and sometimes seemed just weird.  Debbie thought the paint was running down the buildings until Joyce explained that it is part of the art experience.  Larry really liked the property.  He kept walking the perimeter as if he was inspecting the property and told the others the could call him King Larry.  They declined.

Since Greg was not with the group for lunch, standards fell a bit.  It was gyros at a terrific price but felt that Greg would frown on the rating.  The group learned how to buy “Take Away” and secretly brought gyros home to eat  later  but didn’t share this detail with Greg.

Next stop was home  (Remember 11 miles yesterday and our office neighbors would worry if we were gone too long).  Most people fell asleep with the excuse that they were preparing for a late night.

The second stop on the museum pass that day was the Arc de Triomphe de l’Etoile. Long History Moment:  The Arc de Triomphe honors those who fought and died for France in the French Revolutionary and the Napoleonic Wars with the names of all French victories and generals inscribed on its inner and outer surfaces. Beneath its vault lies the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier from World War I.  Famous victory marches around or under the Arc have included the Germans in 1871, the French in 1919, the Germans in 1940, and the French and Allies in 1944 and 1945. (Some of us remember this from school)  After the interment of the Unknown Soldier, however, all military parades  have avoided marching through the actual arch. The route taken is up to the arch and then around its side, out of respect for the tomb and its symbolism. Both Hitler in 1940 and de Gaulle in 1944 observed this custom.

Best of all you can walk up to the top of the Arc.  (Retail value 9.50 Euro) The La Cheap Girls (They thought the La made them sound more sophisticated)  were all over it.   Little Miss Analyst (Debbie who counts steps as she walks, calculates the percentage to completion and gives herself pep talks while climbing) had researched that it was 284 steps.  Joyce felt that they could do 284.  Debbie was maybe not quite as enthused but game.  Jerry and Larry just walked away from the entrance after learning the number of steps and said that they went up last time.  The La Cheap Girls took off with Debbie shouting out the percentage left until she got too winded to talk.  They made friends with other huffing climbers and eventually made it to the top.  Victory pictures for everyone at the top taken by their new friends.  Meanwhile, Larry and Jerry watched a police action with barricaded streets, police cars and lots of action.  They were not upset at all about missing the top and excited about the police action.

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Total Museum Pass value thus far – 19 Euro.

 

 

 

 

Our Paris Flat

The great thing about renting a Paris flat is that you get to live like a true Parisian. However, it sometimes has drawbacks. It is not always what you expect. We rented a two bedroom two bath flat that sleeps eight people.

The Labors of Hercules:  Getting into the flat is similar to the labors (Trials) of Hercules.   The first hurdle is to find the door from the street. There are two big double doors that are street-level but businesses surround the entry door. For example, we have a motorcycle shop next to the double doors. Once you find the door then you have to open with the code.  (We do know the code!).  We just had a problem getting out the door the first morning.  There were three people desperately pulling on every lever on the door until a resident and his son took pity on them.  (No doubt, the son had a good story to tell at school about the dumb tourists).  Once you get inside the courtyard, the next labor is to open the apartment building door unlocked by another code.   Debbie insists on counting the external circular stairs as a labor since she climbed it with a 38.5 pound suitcase.  (There are no elevators). She almost tipped over  threatening to take down three others with a domino effect.  Jerry grabbed the suitcase to change her momentum from down to up and save the tourist domino.  The final piece is to get the key inserted and open the door.  Voilà!  You are now in the apartment and your Herculean Labors are complete.

Bathrooms – The two bathrooms are not as expected.  Two bathrooms in the US would be two rooms.  Right?  The bathrooms are spread out over four rooms.  Two  rooms devoted to toilets that are claustrophobic rooms.  When you sit down on the toilets, it is possible to have one’s knees touch the door. The room containing one of the showers is located next to the downstairs toilet where the monster washer/dryer resides. The other is upstairs next to the kitchen.  The most interesting shower is the one in the corner of Jerry and Joyce’s bedroom.  (See the pictures). Everyone has declined to use that shower.  They think it is just too weird to step out of bed and directly into the shower.  The others have pointed out to Jerry and Joyce that they could save time by laying in bed while the shower warmed up and just rolling straight into the shower.  Joyce has stated that it is too much like sleeping in a bathroom.  Instead, they have converted it into an additional closet.  Debbie and Larry have asked if they can store things in the new closet instead of their bookcases/dressers.

Circular Stairs of Death –  The flat has a wonderful upstairs.  A large open room combining the kitchen, dining room and TV room.  However to reach the room, you must climb the circular stairs of death.  Debbie has taken some stunning shots of Larry and her feet as a visual point of reference (Not to be confused with a bad photographer that forgot to move her feet.)  The stairs are climbed similar to a ladder.  One holds on with both  hands climbing up with the hope that no one has tracked in any mud.  Going down, one tightly holds (hugs) the center pole in case one slips with the belief that one won’t go tumbling down the steps.  (Children of travelers, you should be packing an emergency bag in case you have to come get them when they break a leg.  The unhurt spouse has decided to continue with the trip and it would be easier if you came and got the one with the broken leg.  They may be difficult as they will be mad about going home early.)

Finding best place to buy purchase generic viagra This link has become possible with some evaluation points. Many naturally occurring substances in the body (serotonin, norepinephrine, dopamine) and reuptake inhibitors and releasers the cost of viagra may cause MAOIs to spike dangerously. These drugs are available in the market discount brand viagra in the form of impotence medicines that can help revive the revenue prospects of your business. This could be due to over-dependence on the medications or side effects. levitra canada Neighbors with good work ethics –  The final interesting aspect is our neighbors. There is an office in the flat directly across from Debbie and Larry’s room.  When their window is open, the office workers can see directly into Debbie and Larry’s room.    Debbie wants to keep the windows and curtains shut so they don’t watch her go to bed.  Debbie is having a lot of trouble with Larry as he seems to want to bond with the office workers.  Debbie says that it is not fair to have them get attached and then leave in a few days.   It is disconcerting when you go to bed to have someone watching.

Although there are some differences from what we expect, the experience of living like a Parisian and the extra space is well worth it.  Oui?

 

My Ears Are Freaking on Fire

Sunday night everyone was upstairs watching TV except Don.  Larry had managed to connect the TV to Netflix so the group was busy getting an English fix.  Suddenly and loudly, an alarm went off and kept ringing, beeping, blaring.  Don was downstairs running up and down the hall shouting to upstairs for help with the alarm.  The consensus from upstairs was that it was the building fire alarm.   The group divided into upstairs (generals) and downstairs (feet on the ground troops).

Being a good ex-corporate employee, Debbie went downstairs to get her shoes in preparation to exit the building.  She suddenly found herself enlisted as part of the ground troop.   Debbie found Don with his hands over his ears running back and forth shouting to the upstairs.   It was a lot louder downstairs but really hands on the ears, who does that?  (Debbie thinks standing on the bottom of the stairs). The generals shouted down to  check the smoke alarm downstairs.  So, Debbie and Don headed for the smoke alarm.  Debbie rounded the corner to stand directly in front of the alarm and was hit with the full force of the sound of the alarm.  She had never heard anything so loud in her life and her freaking ears were on fire.  Don grabbed the smoke alarm, tossed it to Debbie and who ran for the door like she had an un-exploded bomb ticking down to zero.   Debbie realized as she ran with the smoke detector the following:

A).  What was she going to do? Throw it in the street?   (Debbie has been watching too many action based movies)

B)  The noise had not changed location thus not it was not the smoke detector.

Debbie threw the smoke alarm on her bed, covered her ears with her hands, and started rocking back and forth.

AND THEN IT STOPPED!!!  Total time elapsed 5 minutes.

No one knew why it stopped.  The generals decided that it was not such a bad experience and thought that Debbie and Don might be exaggerating a bit.  Debbie and Don gave them the stink eye and retreated to their rooms.  This is what is commonly known as the calm before the storm.

After about 15 minutes of peaceful calm, the alarm started again in full force which caused people on the bottom floor to cover their ears and run up and down the halls again.  All of the upstairs eventually came down to investigate and Debbie is rather pleased to report that they too turned the corner into the full force of the alarm, covered their ears, and ran back down the hall. As a safety measure, front line people were issued toilet paper for their ears.  (Larry needs to work on technique as his toilet paper hung like streamers from his ears)  After consolidating all the intel (the freaking alarm blaring in the background the whole time), the following was decided:

  • It was the bugler alarm in the apartment going off
  • Every room was equipped with loud speakers to enhance the volume. (Who puts a loud speaker in the toilet?  No self respecting thief would hang around after that alarm went off.  They too would run for the hills hands over ears)
  • The neighbors were probably going to yell at them soon.
  • The most important fact – No one knew the code to turn the alarm off

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After about 15 minutes of blaring “ears on fire” noise, Joyce called the owner who didn’t have the code either.  “It just couldn’t be the bugler alarm as it was from the previous owner and not turned on.”  (Listen lady, can’t you hear it over the phone because everyone is pretty sure that the alarm can be heard at the Arc de Triomphe about a mile down the street?  You have a misconception that it is not turned on and that is why we are shouting into the phone now)  Still the alarm blares on.

AND THEN IT STOPPED AGAIN….  Total time elapsed 20 minutes of “ears on fire” blaring alarm.  The group is happy to report that not one neighbor complained, the owner brought over a remote to turn  off  the alarm, the alarm has not gone off again and Debbie thinks that she may have PTS.