You Did What?

For those of you that don’t know, Debbie has some very active dreams.  She talks and fights in her dreams.  Sometimes, she has been known to fall out of bed.  A couple of days before Lindsey visited Debbie had an incident.  When Debbie’s concierge medical staff (Lindsey) arrived, she noticed Debbie’s injury.

Lindsey:  What happened to your finger?

Debbie:  I fell out of bed on my finger.

Lindsey:  I am sorry.  What did you do?

Debbie:  I fell out of bed on my finger.  Well, actually I jumped out of bed.

Lindsey:  Did you mean to do that?

Debbie:  Well, no

Lindsey:  I don’t want to know.  We won’t discuss what you did.  Can you bend it?

Debbie:  Look – Yes, it is fine – swollen but it bends

Lindsey:  Your finger is crooked

Debbie:  I noticed that but thought it would straighten out

Lindsey:  It is broken

Debbie:  What?  No, no, no, no it is not broken.  You can’t just look at a finger and say it is broken.

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Debbie:  I will concede that it could possibly be broken and will get an X-ray at home.

Lindsey:  Okay, I hope your finger is not crooked for life.

Over the next two days, Debbie stared at her finger a lot and kept wiggling it.  The finger continued to be crooked. The night of the Lava Walk, Larry suggested a finger splint.  Debbie and Larry bought a $6.00 splint at the drugstore which was applied by the medical concierge.  (Note:  Debbie made the lava hike with a splinted finger.  She is so brave.)  By Sunday, Debbie reached the conclusion that perhaps she should get her finger x-rayed in Hawaii so it would not be crooked for life.  After calling around, it was determined that only an emergency room had an x-ray machine. An Er visit was added to the “to do” list but there are not many hospitals on the Big Island.  Debbie armed herself wit the list of hospitals in case they passed one.

After the Pololu Hike (again Debbie was so brave to try to hike with perhaps a broken finger), the group headed for the Kahola Hospital Emergency room mostly because Debbie put it in the GPS and the GPS would not let it go.   They rolled up to the hospital Emergency Room and knocked on the door at 4:00 in the afternoon.  (Imagine a quaint Hawaiian hospital in a TV sitcom shocked to have an emergency).  They let Debbie in and directed her to one of the two er rooms through the hospital hallways.  (The group decided it might be a nursing home/hospital)  Debbie was the only patient in ER.  The rest of her entourage followed and  lined up for the bathroom. (Remember the Pololu hike and no bathrooms?)   Joyce decided to retreat to the car as other patients were quite vocal and freaking her out.  Jerry and Larry sat in chairs for prime examination viewing sort of like an audience.  The concierge sat on the table with Debbie for support.

The admin and nurse took the history and said the doctor would be called in.   (Joyce saw him stroll across the parking lot after being called in).  About 4:30, Dr. Green appeared in his shorts and Hawaiian shirt.  Both the nurse and doctor were quite impressed with Debbie’s crooked finger.  Debbie just held up the finger and no further discussion was needed about what was wrong.  The x-ray tech (also in Hawaiian shirt with a pony tail)  escorted Debbie to x-ray for 3 x-rays (the entourage did not go xray.)  The doctor and patient reviewed the results.  “Broken”.  (Man, that concierge is good).

On the way back from x-ray, Debbie confessed that Lindsey was a concierge and that the doctor would need to answer some questions for Debbie’s entourage.  She asked that he be sure and include the fact that Debbie should not do any more dishes in his medical instructions.   Dr.  Green offered Debbie some free pain med samples which Debbie thought was a nice idea.  After Dr. Green checked with Lindsey,  the meds were cancelled.   (Debbie was sad).  Debbie also declined the $50.00 splint as Dr. Green said that the $6.00 splint was an excellent idea and worked just fine but she could have the more expensive splint if she wanted.  (Les Cheap Girl).

Dr. Green felt bad that he was unable to provide any services other than a CD of the xrays and the diagnosis that the finger was broken.  The doctor did give Debbie a chocolate cupcake since he couldn’t do anything else and thought she was very brave.   Debbie did not feel bad about eating a cupcake in front of everyone although she got chocolate on her splint.  They left the hospital at 5:15.  (Dr. Green forgot to mention the dish thing – Debbie was sad again).

The group found Joyce napping in the car.  In celebration of a successful ER visit and as payment to the concierge, shaved ice for everyone!